~Lilly, Bringer of Joy~ 1/13/14-5/25/25

Some favorites of my Lilly.

It’s been a month since she left moving at the only speed she ever had, fast. While I will never stop missing her, I’m reshaping myself as an I not a we and find comfort in the knowledge that who I am now is because she helped me shape myself the whole time she was with me. She taught me so much about behavior (across the species), life, and joy. 

Many of you have heard my story of how Lilly arrived, but here it is for those who don’t know it and just for the reminder of magic. Dixie, my Aussie, died on a Monday. The following Sunday evening I was looking on a few rescue sites and I heard a voice (I normally only hear my own voices) that said, “You don’t need to look for a dog, the right dog will appear.” The following morning I had a message from a friend, our fairy dogmother, “I know it may be too soon, but I have a dog you should meet.” With the message was a photo of Lilly and I knew I was supposed to meet her. I met her that Tuesday and on Friday she came to visit to make sure she’d be okay with the resident cats. I brought her home for good on that Saturday. 

From fairly early on I had the sense that we would not have a long time together. I have two daily gratitude practice groups, one started 15 years ago and the other started 11 years ago. I know having that strong foundation in the perspective of gratitude in combination with the sense that I wouldn’t have long with Lilly allowed me to fully appreciate her every day we were together. During our time together I knew I would never know another dog like her and would never have the connection we had.

Nine packed years. She stayed just days past her 9th gotcha day. She helped me transition from massage therapist to dog trainer, being my partner through the KPA-CTP program, and helping me get my CCUI. We did all the sports and we were perfection as a team whether it was actually in sports or in daily life. We did some dock diving, but in rally she shone. We didn’t trial much, but titled rapidly in rally because we qualified in all but one run in our whole career. She loved tricks and so many people loved watching her run through her repertoire which was quite extensive. NW was our main sport and we eventually became a super solid team. She broadened my world bringing in so many people and dogs. We walked and hiked many, many miles together and that was when we were most in sync, our rhythms fitting together and into the greater rhythms of the planet. Those hikes were a necessity for both of us. But, Lilly’s greatest love was water. I always joked that if we ever got lost, we wouldn’t die of thirst, because Lilly would lead us to the water. 

I am comforted knowing her final days were full of her favorite things and beings. Her arrival was magical and speedy. Our time together was magical and full. Her departure was a gift in that there were no decisions to make other than to be there, hands on her body, for her final breaths. Everything is energy and while there is a hole in the physical plane where she was by my side, we were already one and will always be one. We are all part of the whole.

RESET, a guided meditation

Sunrise, April 3, 2020

Many of us are in close quarters with our families and housemates (humans and nonhumans alike) and spending more time together than usual. With the added stresses of our current reality, this makes for some different energy patterns between beings. My intention for this Monday’s meditation is to create and hold space for you as I guide you to clear your heart to heart connections and reconnect with yourself.

Here is what two of last Monday’s meditation participants had to say:
“Loved the meditation on Monday.”
"I really enjoyed the meditation last night!!!"

Care to join me?

RESET, a guided meditation
Monday, April 6th
By Phone
7-7:30 PM EDT
Pay-what-you-can, with a suggested donation of $5

REGISTER HERE

I have spent more than a decade learning how to navigate my inner landscape, how to support myself in navigating a culture I rarely feel in sync with, and how to share my explorations of the heart to heart web of this world. I often receive information via clairsentience, and that is how I became an Intuitive Guide. I am a travel guide to the realms unseen, a realmwalker. While we’re all staying home, you may find a yearning or need to delve into an unseen world. If you would like a guide for that exploration, please contact me for a session. If you are experiencing financial hardship, please let me know and we will figure something out.

May you find the patterns that help you create the rhythm you need for your days. Breathe, be you, part of the whole.

~Namaste

Are You a Human Being or a Human Doing?

For several reasons, I’m trying to stay in closer contact with friends via messaging and texting in this new reality. While the country is slow as a whole to grasp what is needed to flatten the curve, it is only a matter of time before we’re on a lockdown. Might as well start these patterns to stay in touch with people now. And in more normal times, I know that an important part of my mental and emotional health is quality human time. A normal week for me is full of planned walks and calls with friends to make sure I get that quality human time.

We live in an age where most people spend the vast majority of time staring at a screen. When they’re not working , they’re staring at their phone, tablet, or computer. There’s a massive disconnect. And it’s a disconnect from everything that’s actually real and important. It’s a disconnect from self. It’s a disconnect from other beings: humans and companion animals. It’s a disconnect from the natural world of which we are key parts. People have tried to become human doings instead of human beings. They are constantly doing and going. Being has become something foreign.

Now we are being suddenly tossed onto a new planet where we can’t go and do all the time. And the immediate thought is, “What do I do?” This is a time to look for the constants. This is a time to look for the connections. This is a time to explore yourself and your world in new ways.

What are the constants? First the natural world, of which we are a part, is the most powerful constant. It’s right outside your window. Even if you can’t go outside much or far, or are in an urban area, you have access. Look at the sky: clouds, birds, insects, colors, shapes, movement. Look at the trees and plants and landforms. Look at the animals: insects, birds, reptiles, amphibians, mammals. Look for the elements: earth, fire, water, wind, wood, stone, metal, ether, light, star, storm. Look to the humans who are constants and stay in contact with them by phone, video chat, messaging. Look to the companion animals who are always there supporting us. Second, look within yourself for the constants. This may not be as familiar a landscape for you. Take your time with this exploration. What do you know about yourself? Your likes and dislikes, your skills, gifts. What do you know about different aspects of yourself like your physical, emotional, mental, energy bodies? What do you know about your heart space? You will find constants within yourself as you explore.

Where are the connections? These may be with other humans, but they may be with companion animals, plants, characters in books. These may be the connections that you see and feel at more of a distance like the connections between trees in a wood, or the connections between grackles as their flock flies into the tree in your yard. Everything in our world is interconnected. Humans are not special in having and feeling connections. Look around you and explore.

Knowing self is one of the main reasons we are here. You can’t know other until you truly know self. Take this time in this different reality to do some inner spelunking. If you’re at home with your family, do it together. This is how massive change is created: person by person. You have power, use it wisely and with love.

~Namaste

Seeking Unity on This Journey

Yellow Mountain dawn gloaming

August flew by with busy days and the steadily lengthening dark. Our early morning walks are shifting, bit by bit, with the light. More of our feathered friends are moving through on their journeys toward their winter homes. Deer are herding up: coats browning, antlers growing, fawns so much bigger now. It’s so dry here; leaves are already falling steadily from some trees. The creeks, rivers, ponds, and lakes levels continue to drop and some are almost completely dry. After such a wet year last year, this feels even more drastic.

Migrations: many species migrate as a regular and key part of their existence. Climate change is like a pendulum swinging farther to the extremes and there is extremely noticeable change of many species due to this. The refugee crisis around the world is tied into the effects of climate change on humans and the thought that humans don’t migrate is absurd. As a species we have long (probably always) migrated even if the reasons may appear different. There are many other species who are adjusting in a positive way and there is always much we can learn from other beings.

Separation and unity are two opposite experiences for us as humans. Separation is often tied in with the fear based us against them perspective. Unity is what most of us are actually seeking: a belonging and feeling of being known and accepted and loved. But in our current culture and society, these two are often woven together in a warped way, so people unite around a sports teams or school or country but take it to an extreme with a fear based us against them perspective. We already belong, it’s being able to remember and know that we belong to this greater whole that is key.

Part of my mission is to help people experience unity and belonging as part of nature, part of the larger organism of Gaia and this multiverse. I am forever thinking of “when I walk” sentences as I try to put into words the powerful beyond words experience every time I take a walk. But, all those sentences boil down to: when I walk I know I am part of the whole. And while walking is one way I experience unity and belonging as part of nature, another way is to experience heart to heart connections with other beings. Whenever I work with a new client for a companion animal session, there is an added layer of joy-aha-pure life when a person experiences that heart to heart level with their companion animal(s). The newfound awareness of unity, belonging, connection is profound.

~Namaste

Current Energies, Transformation, and Bears, Oh My!

July dawn beam. Just like food is the original medicine, self-care is energetic nourishment.

The eclipse season starts tomorrow with the new moon total solar eclipse (visible in South America) and Mercury goes retrograde on Sunday. It’s not just getting hot outside, the inner realms are getting hot, too! I’ve been experiencing lots of shifts on all layers and feel like June couldn’t possibly have been so full when it flew by so fast. There’s much about completion right now from deaths to jobs to personal patterns to karmic patterns. I’m seeing it in others, hearing it from others, and experiencing doozy level completions myself. If you’re interested in seeing what resonates for you in the current astrology, check here to see the astrologers I follow.

Last week I had a brief but clear dream full of nonhuman animals, with the closest and most prominent being a large bear sitting in front of me staring at me. I felt no fear, just a very matter of fact sense of being in the presence of a bear. The following morning Lilly and I met a friend for an early morning hike where we saw a huge bear walking down the trail towards us. We stopped, bear stopped. And eventually the bear turned around and walked back down the trail with one pause and glance over the shoulder at us before disappearing around the curve. We waited a bit before proceeding along the trail. The bear had left the trail at some point and we neither saw nor heard any more from a bear on our hike. For this to occur in the space of deep transformation I am currently experiencing feels potent. It is summer and I normally see lots of wildlife, but the past month has been rich with wildlife. Typically I don’t feel that the nonhuman creatures I see or hear are messengers, it’s more that they remind me of the webs within which we exist, and the similarities and differences among all of us as parts of the whole. Especially in a time of transformation, the support that I feel from so many reminders helping me remember and know I am part of the whole is priceless and affirming.

How are you currently navigating and/or experiencing life?

In my quest to reach more people with whom to share my work, I have a super short survey for you. Thank you for taking a few minutes to fill it out!

Are You Grounded? What Does That Even Mean?

Yellow Mountain June sunrise.

While being grounded is something I’ve always been able to do, or really be, with a fair amount of ease, I am always (still) exploring it and ways of describing it. Grounded can have different meanings. Typically when people talk about being grounded, they mean specifically grounded in the earth. But for someone who does not have earth as one of her major elements, being grounded in earth can actually be a big interruption of flow. We are here in this human experience physically connected to this planet and we need to maintain that physical connection to the earth herself. But we don’t have to be weighed down by it.

I find that a different perspective or way of describing being grounded is: the flow in connection here in this body. If you’ve worked with me, you’ve, more than likely, experienced gold and brown light flowing through you, the connecting energies between your higher self and the earth. This is your manifestation in the physical plane. And this is an important connection to maintain. For many folks who don’t have earth as a major element, shifting the definition of grounded to a connection between higher self and the planet can make a huge difference. It is suddenly not an interruption of your being or a burden, but a connecting flow allowing you to be you.

Another aspect of being grounded which is less about the earth element and more about your major elements, has to do with being fully of the essence of the elements that are your major elements. This allows you to have a very different support within your energy structure. I used to specifically offer a short guided meditation for discovering your major elements where part of the discovery was receiving a shortcut to shift you into the space of sensing that support in your energy structure. This specific meditation hasn’t been called upon recently, but it’s suddenly come back into the light.

While being grounded has been a theme recently with clients, it’s also timely with the bigger energies. This week we’ve got the full moon (full earlier this morning at 4:30am) and the solstice on Friday at 11:54am. When the bigger energies, or people without healthy boundaries are pulling you off kilter, find your way into your elemental structure and you’re able to more safely and comfortably navigate the world.

Be sure to get outside to lie, sit, walk, dance this week. I have been feeling a pull to lead a solstice walk Friday evening, but so far have only receive a vague bit instead of details. If this interests you, please let me know and we’ll line it up.

~Namaste

Timing, Rhythms, and Paths

Blue grosbeak

When you pay attention to timing, rhythms, and paths, you find where you intersect with others. On our morning walks this is literal. While the time of our walk shifts with the light throughout the year, it’s a pretty gradual shifting most of the time. Who do we intersect with? Four deer cross our path at the same spot for much of the year. Grasshopper sparrows and meadowlarks are in the same areas of field and fence as we pass by from spring through fall. The adult foxes have slightly more variable rhythms but we often see one or know one has just crossed our path. This year the blue grosbeaks are nesting close to our path and this morning we got to see the male in a display with head feathers spiked, tail feathers dragging the ground, and wings moving slowly out and in as the female watched from the fence. He was just ahead of us and didn’t seem perturbed by us. We stopped to watch (just as we stop for the deer to cross) and he eventually flew up to where the nest seems to be. For me, awareness of where I intersect with others who are wild(er than I) really helps me know I am part of the whole. I can feel my part in the symphony of life. Who are you intersecting with and where?